Thursday, August 14, 2008

Thursday Thirteen #8: 13 Pieces of Spam in my Inbox



13. All Famous BRANDs Rep1icaWatches at AffordablePrices, Japanese & Swiss Movements.

Um. No. Why do people buy things from these stupid spam stores??





12. Swiss Lotto Promotions: Internet Emails Award Call Your Claims Agent (Mr Luis Johnson)

Dear Mr. Johnson: This is the 787th time I've won a European lottery. Oddly enough, I still have to balance my checkbook every month to make sure nothing bounces.



11. Make Algae Biodiesel at Home!

Wait. What?

Do you suppose I can make it from my moldy bread? Mold... algae... same family, right?



10. 1 hour to fall in love with Captain Cooks.

This Captain Cook? No? Good.. cuz, I'm not really into necrophilia.




9. Full video without cowards Nicole Richie.

Take a look at that photo... no coward would be with her. I think you'd have to be very, very brave. Yes?



8. Subject: :o)

That is, hands down, the nicest piece of spam I've ever gotten. I was almost tempted to open it.

Almost.



7. All participants will receive a bonus.

Participants in WHAT? And... what kind of bonus? An STD, perhaps?? Hmmm...




6. Donation From Mrs Susan Morgan.

Anything that begins "Dearest one in God" freaks me out just a bit. And, most assuredly there is no one else in the entire country of Kuwait she could find to give her bazillions to. I am so blessed.

Want to buy a bridge?



5. This is extremely important for your health.

It is?? SPAM is important (sorry... EXTREMELY important) to my health? And here I thought spam was bad for me. Who knew?




4. 2оо8 г.- руководителю зарплата в белую ЮиБюу.

Um.... Hmmmm.... Well....

Anyone speak Russian?




3. do u want good pay job? World recognized University Dip1oma/Degree/Bacheloor for you

What I want is for u idiots to stop emailing me. If I wanted a bacheloor degree (::rolls eyes::), I'd probably get it from someone who could... oh... SPELL!




2. ViagraCailis from $1.26 per pill, Fast Delivery Guaranteeed, save $ with us

Again, I say this: If the "pharmacy" can't even spell the drug name right, I'm supposed to pop the pills into my mouth? Cialis isn't that far off from Cyanide. Am I right??


And, lastly... I've combined a couple that deal with one issue: sexual performance:


1a. Few simple steps to dominating in bedroom

Um... does this have anything to do with whips and chains?

1b. Can your male problems be cured with a pilule?

Honey, if my male problems could be solved with a pilule, I'd be all over it.



6 comments:

Lori Dillon said...

Hmm, my spam seems to be mostly for penile enlargers. Too bad I don't have one. Or being woman, I guess that's a good thing. *G*

Paige Tyler said...

I get bunches of spam, too!

*hugs*
Paige

My TT is at http://paigetylertheauthor.blogspot.com/

Kealie Shay said...

*snicker* You crack me up. This was fun.

Jennifer McKenzie said...

Wow! You get interesting spam!!!!

Genesis said...

I used to wonder why people say they loved spam...now I happily admit that I love it too...lol It's so funny and I'm loving your TT!

Thanks for visiting mine

Peace

Genesis

Robin L. Rotham said...

You know you've hit the big time when you get spam in Russian, LOL!