PG to X-rated and Everything in Between

I'm a bit blank this morning -- just finished up edits on "Blue Light Special" and my brain is mush, so I'm stealing a post from my virtual tour from May. Enjoy!

PG to X-rated and Everything in Between

I love love. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t prefer reading books that included a little romance ... after all, even Cinderella kissed her prince, and who could forget “Lady and the Tramp” and its spaghetti scene?

As I grew older, I moved on from “Snow White” to “Forever” by Judy Blume where ... OMG... the heroine HAS SEX with her boyfriend. It all ends very badly, and I’m sure it was meant to teach me a lesson, but all of us seventh graders knew exactly which pages had THAT on it and we returned to them again and again.

By eighth grade, I was reading Harlequin Presents (not those dull romances where nothing happens... oh no, I wanted my characters to get it on) and found myself intrigued by all that tension and crackling fire between men and women.

By high school, I was feeling a little bit of that crackling myself. So THAT’S what it’s all about. I’ll admit to being a late bloomer—no nookie in high school for me—but I indulged in plenty of necking and lots of letting my guy make it to second and third base and, oh yeah, it was the ultimate. And I knew then that S-E-X was really all that.

When I started putting pen to paper, though, writing sex scenes was really difficult. I loved, Loved, LOVED writing tension: those little shivers when he brushes your hand, the tingles from head to toe during that first kiss, the tension low in your gut when his tongue touches yours and you feel him hard against you. One of my writing friends used to write these great stories, with incredible plots that were terribly romantic, and then she’d send them to me with the request to add that all important sexual tension. It was, by far, my favorite thing to write.

But strangely enough, I just couldn’t bring myself to pen “the act”.

That all changed when I was challenged to write something for Whipped Cream Reviews’ short story page. Another pre-published friend and I gave it a go (and it became the beginning of The Menagerie Authors – the website and blog I share with three other awesome erotic authors) and I had a BLAST! Sex was fun, fun, fun! And, shockingly, it was published (it’s here if you’re interested in seeing my very first attempt: http://tinyurl.com/2we7vnr).

There was no going back. Writing a LOT of sex is almost easier than not writing sex—your characters can live “if it feels good, do it”. They need motivation, of course, and I prefer to have the emotion there, too, or else it’s not erotic romance, but it was freeing.

I’ll be honest, I still like writing sweeter romance, but not too sweet. I find it somehow abnormal when I read stories where the main characters don’t even kiss before professing their love for one another. There have been seven month babies since the dawn of time – it happens. After all, to quote George Michael, “Sex is natural, sex is fun...”

Go ahead. Indulge. Read it. Write it. Live it. ;-)

What Do YOU Think Qualifies as "Erotic Romance"?

I've been mulling something over lately because of a few comments and conversations I've seen and had. I read a review a couple of weeks ago that said something about that particular story being a "real" erotic romance which thrilled the reviewer because most of the erotic romance stories are "just" really hot sex.

I've also been challenged by my WRP editor to write a story that would qualify at "two roses" -- meaning it will include menage or bondage. Now, I'm more than cool with a good menage, and a little light bondage works for me, but mostly when I write (and read) erotic romance, I prefer one-on-one steamy sex.

I wonder -- do you, as a reader, feel somehow cheated if there isn't a little something *more* in your erotic romance? Do you think it's not really erotic if you don't have a little "tie me up, tie me down" or more than two bodies in bed?

And, what qualifies as "hot" when it comes to sex anyway? Does it need to be public, or does your heroine need to be a contortionist or should there be a touch of the voyeur? If they only do it in bed, in missionary position with one person, does it count?

What do YOU like in your erotic romance? What's the line where a spicy mainstream romance becomes erotic?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Why Am I Embarassed?

"OH, guess what she does NOW... she writes Erotic Romance!" Yup, my cousin let the cat out of the bag with that drunken pronouncement.

Recently, while out on the town with my cousin and some college friends visiting Vegas I was faced with this dilemma: Do I own up to what I do when it might change the way someone looks at me? Can I live with myself if I lie about it, because I love what I write?

"No, way!" One of the guys with us was boggle-eyed and obviously not a believer. "YOU? The girl who doesn't drink alcohol? Who only drinks soda all night long? No WAY!" Then he tilted his head, "Nevermind, I can totally see it." I guess he was remembering the fact that I don't need alcohol to dance on the bar/tabletop with the other goyles... or maybe he was remembering thirty minutes before when I switched out my super-heavy sweater for my cousin's much lighter one all while sitting at our table in the club (in my defense it was sweltering and she wasn't using hers... and no skin showed.. okay my arm and shoulder did). Nevertheless he demanded proof of my "OTHER" job.

Unfortunately... or fortunately depending on your outlook... my cousin pulled out her iPhone and punched in the Long And Short website where my three short stories currently reside. If it was possible (and believe me it was) his eyes bugged out even more, "I'll have to read this later... when you're not around. HERE, program it into MY iPhone!"

Now, while I DID program it for him, I didn't call him later to ask if he had indeed read them after I was no longer around. A very large part of me was glad he showed an interest (along with all the other people in our group)... but I wasn't all that surprised. He is after all a guy and if it has sex in it they're all for it. The other part of me was a bit embarassed though, and that made me a bit angry. WHY was I embarassed about something I love doing, I enjoy reading, and that has quite a large number of fans?

Honestly? Because, I didn't really want to change that Status Quo we had come to rely on. I didn't want to have to explain why I chose this genre... or if I'd actually done the things I write about. Because, while I adore them... there are just some things that they don't need to know about me. If my hubby had been with us I know that he would have smiled and said he loved the research aspect of it (like someone else has said HER hubby likes to say... ahem... Nina), but looking my friends in the face I smiled and changed the subject. Don't worry, they brought it back up again later, and I had made my peace with them knowing, so it was all good.

But the question still remains... WHY am I embarassed when the subject comes up (except with certain members of my family, my cousin to name one)? Am I the only one who struggles with telling someone I've known "before" the writing? Believe me, it's not something I'm going to be telling my Mother-In-Law that I do, and other more judgemental members of my family don't need to know either as they already make some family gatherings... interesting, but I LOVE what I do and I'm not ashamed, but I am embarassed to explain. So... anyone else have these issues? I'm just wondering.

If Kealie Can Do It...

... I didn't remember what day it was either! Must be a crazy week at the zoo, er, Menagerie *G*.

I have a free erotic short story that will run TOMORROW (Thursday the 25th) at the Whipped Cream Reviews website. The link will be on their story page (right now it's Kealie's story, which is good, too!!) - here.

I was glad they folks there liked it, as I was a little disheartened today. It seems as though the publishing house I was writing my short story for (over there on the sidebar) may not be interested in it because it's about a married couple. And they may not consider it a romance, per se.

So, I have decisions to make (though I may still submit there, and give them the chance to say no):

Do I -

1. Make them not married?
2. Make the story edgier to fit another publishing house or, along those lines make it longer to fit somewhere else?
3. Toss it into the computer's recycle bin.

Decisions, decisions....

But, at least SOMEONE likes my writing! So, after you go look (on Thursday!), I'd love to hear what you think.

You Write What?

What is so wrong with what we do?

I've been pondering this question quite a bit lately. What is so bloody wrong with being a Romance author/reader?

A friend of mine (You know who you are) recently spoke of this and I've been thinking about it, off and on, ever since. A Romance Writer gets a bad rap, and we get painted with the smut brush for writing... trash. For some reason Romance is not considered a respectable fiction genre to write. I don't understand the reasoning behind this opinion. What is better than the give and take of a couple as they find their way in the world together? To me there is nothing more beautiful than a couple in love, whether they are made up of a man and a woman, two women, or two men... Or any other combination thereof. There is still the romance, the give and take and compromise and the utter romance of getting to know someone so intimately. Are these critical people unaware that Romance sells? Why when Romance sales are astronomical does no one seem to want to admit that they read them? So, who IS reading them? How do they explain that at a recent book signing I attended there were over 300 people in attendance? Shouldn't they get a clue that we're not going to agree with them, so stop harping on us about it.


Now, as Erotic Romance writers we face an even nastier stigma. We not only write "smut", we write "Pornographic Smut". Again, I ask, what is so wrong with what we do? I personally enjoy romance, and sex (much to my hubby's delight) and I am very comfortable in my sexuality (see hubby's previous response). Maybe it was the way I was raised, but I don't see what is so wrong with that. That being said, I don't really see me telling my inlaws what I write anytime soon. They're not bad people, just... conservative.

And while I love them dearly, I don't think they'd take it all that well. I refuse to let someone make me feel dirty because I'm comfortable with sex and everything THAT entails.

So, what do you think? Why do Romance writers, and more specifically, Erotic Romance writers get such a bad rap?

So, that's mini-rant today. I love what I do, it makes me smile and keeps me busy between ... well, life stuff. So, I dare them to come at me... I'll come right back at em with guns blazing. Yes, yes, a little militant, but I just spent the weekend with people who turned their noses up to Romance novels in any form and it got my Irish up.

HOT enough... ?

What to do when you finish a manuscript and your muse pipes up. You are starting to reread so that you can catch anything glaringly wrong. And out of the blue, my muse pipes up in a sex scene, "Ahem... that isn't hot enough! You need put something else there! Something MORE!"

Well, crap, what more do I need to add? Am I the only one with a fickly b... ahem, pain for a muse? She can get me going on my plot, on my characters and even on some of the hotter scenes ("You know you want to tie someone up there. NO, not her... HE needs to be bound! Imagine his surprise if he likes it!"). But when she waits until the last sentence to tell me that she thought there was something not hot enough in the previous paragraphs... I want to wring her bloody neck. What does she do?
She laughs at me and flits off to flirt with one of the men in my head.

So, how am I supposed to reconcile "It's NOT HOT enough" ? Did I not put enough sensory explanations? Did I not use words that were explicit enough? (HA... my Southern gramma would have had heart palpitations if she'd heard that one) And while my darling DH is more than willing to sacrifice himself upon the altar of my muse, there is only so much I'm willing to ask him to do... wait let me rethink that one. LOL

Ah, well, guess I'm going back over THAT scene again. Hmm... how hot is hot enough? You'll just have to wait and see.

In Hiding

My name isn't Mysti Holiday, and I write erotic romance.

Yes, it's true -- my legal name is NOT Mysti Holiday. The picture on my profile is not my leg. I'm a closet erotica author.

My mother doesn't know. My kidlet doesn't know. My family, my in-laws, my neighbors... they don't know either. Most of my friends (except for Kealie and Jenny Kat, of course)... they're in the dark, too.

I can't imagine coming out of the closet any time soon. I'll be the one at the book signing wearing a Zorro mask, or maybe even a Chewbacca costume.

Of course, my DH knows... he'd wonder about my questions ("...does the human body bend this way?") and my, um, behavior if he didn't. He happily supports me, but I imagine he'd be horrified if any of his friends knew. He'd be like Roger in "Lethal Weapon IV" when he had to tell Riggs that all that money... you remember, the money that came from his wife's bodice rippers...

I does make me wonder, though. How many erotica authors write under their legal name? How many proudly announce their occupation to their family, friends, neighbors and people they meet on the street? And, even more importantly, how many of those family, friends and neighbor's aren't shocked? Are even, perhaps... supportive?

How does one come out of the erotica closet?