Dedications

I've been considering something over the past couple of days... dedications in a book.

Here's why.

A few days ago, an author whose blog I frequent on a daily basis, and who I have a IRL albeit long-distance relationship with, announced her latest release and posted the dedication in it. It thanked the people who read her blog regularly and commented and then proceeded to say "especially..." and listed a dozen, some of whom she didn't even know by name, only by blog title.

I wasn't there.

Now, I know it's not a big deal, and I know she both appreciates my support and my friendship, and she certainly didn't owe me anything, but it still stung a little. Silly? Maybe. Even so, it got me to thinking about how easily it would be to alienate someone that way.

The thing is, I don't expect to ever be listed in a dedication -- but I guess when you include a group of people to whom I belong, it's a painful little poke when I don't get named.

I write and publish mainstream romance under a different name. That name and this name shall never be spoken in the same breath for a variety of reasons. I bring this up because in my first published novel I mentioned a group of people in the dedication, and then did an "especially..." and listed some names. And now I wonder -- did I hurt someones feelings by NOT listing them?

I doubt I'll ever do that again in a dedication. I'll do one or the other. I'll say, "Thanks to my writing group." or "Thanks to JoBeth, Jolene and Joe Bob." And, I know that it may seem silly or petty or any number of adjectives, but I know how sad the situation made me feel for a bit, and I don't want anyone else to feel that way because of me if I can help it.

What do you think? Am I wrong to feel the way I do? Did I overreact to the situation? How do you decide what to put in your dedications (and do you ever consider how it will make people feel)?