Wait, Who's That Girl Again?

Hey all, I know I've been gone a long time... sort of. I pop in now and then for interviews and hotties with Megan, but for the most part I have been seriously incommunicado. Some of you are most likely thinking, "Kealie? Who's this Kealie person?" I know, I didn't call, I didn't write (in more ways than one)... but I have very good reasons. Can you guess what they might be? I'll give a hint:



Yup, that's right, there's a new addition to the Shay household. It wasn't an easy time of it, and there were more important things than keeping up online. Yeah, don't worry, you're not the only people I forgot to keep up with... Just ask, Megan, Mysti, and JennyKat. Add more complications after the fact, some scary "We came this close to losing you!" comments and I had to take a few steps back and try to get better before I could be my bad self again. Since I'm feeling more like myself again, and am somehow managing to find at least a few hours in the day for myself, I'm back!



So, hopefully, now that I can think again, and my characters have decided that I've had enough of a break, my mind and muse are going crazy telling me I'm on notice and need to get some of this stuff I had to put off for a bit DONE! So, that's the plan.



I've missed being here, I've missed my girls, I've seriously missed the Cabana Boys (who are now the best looking babysitters in the world!), so here's keeping my fingers crossed that nothing else gets thrown at me... cuz I think I'm done for the year. :::nods:::

Poking My Head In

Yes, I know. I have been seriously MIA lately. Other than the posting during Halloween, I've been... missing. I hope everyone can forgive me. My girls, Megan and Mysti have held it together, but I know they were worried for a bit there.

I won't bore you with the details, other than to say that there have been health issues, family issues and just life issues that cropped up. I'm hoping... praying... wishing... that all will be quiet now and I can actually get back to doing what I love. Writing, chatting, catching up with all my online friends.

I didn't get back on the wagon in time for NaNo this year, and a part of me is a bit upset by that. Even though I haven't won one yet, it was fun the last time I did it. I guess I could start now, but the month is already half over... and I just don't see it happening, lol. I'm barely getting back onto a writing schedule.

There are a couple of things I have in the works, and something that Megan and I are working on. We work well together, which is seriously helped along by the whole best friend, finish each other's sentences thing. We're both hoping that within the next few weeks we'll be far enough along, and happy enough with our progress to actually... talk about what we're doing. A whole new world will be opening up... we hope. So, stay tuned on that front.

So, how's everyone else doing? Did you miss me... or even notice I dropped off the face of the internet? What's something you're looking forward to? Anything? Anyone? I know, we can't catch up in one post... but hopefully, we'll at least start.

Family, Feelings and Funny Happenings

I've been sitting here trying to figure out what to write about today. And honestly nothing was coming to me. Still no news on my Cowboy story that I sent off to another publisher. I'm keeping my fingers crossed, but I can't stay in a state of constant... freaking out, lol. So, I check my emails a little less... hmmm... neurotically, and I hope for the best and work on my other stuff.

This week I have had family in town. And while I love and adore my family, they are a loud, rambunctious group of emotional vampires. I love being around them, but by the time I get home... I'm exhausted and ready for bed. Now imagine doing that over and over again for an entire week and then having the spector of the in-laws coming into town for a big birthday for one of my children and you'll see what my life is right now.

Among the chaos, there is fun and laughter and downright silliness... especially when you get members of my rather large Irish/German family (on my mother's side) in one house. It blows people's minds when they see all of us together, but they soon start to believe me when I say, "I'm the quiet one." No, really, I AM the quiet one. Those of you who know me are rolling your eyes, "Uh huh.... suuuuuuure you are, Kealie!" But once you see my entire family in action... it starts to make sense.

The night before last we had about 25 family members (Yes, they were ALL related to me in one way or another) gathered in my parents' house. We honestly don't need a reason, but add the fact that my sister who doesn't live here came down for a visit with her husband and children, and we have ample reason to gather and wreak havoc.

This time, there seemed to be a bit of a... passing of the flame if you will. For years my family has played a game called May I. It's a... "bastardized version" of Gin Rummy (according to my sister). We've been playing this card game for as long as I can remember. As children we watched our parents and listened to them howl and holler at each other when someone took a card they wanted or skunked the whole table by going out and leaving the others with hundreds of points in their hands. As we got older we were slowly taught the game and after the first hand you won... you were on your own. As each of us has grown into adulthood, we've progressed and excelled at the game until we had to have our own table of cards away from the adults.

At this family get-together, only the younger generation played the game, while the older generation stood by and commented or talked amongst themselves. So, me, my one cousin, my other cousin's fiance, my sister, her husband and the baby of the family, my youngest cousin who just turned 18 last month set about playing our own game of May I. Slowly, the volume grew (nothing new in a large family) and the older generation started to make some... complaints. "You're getting too loud over there!" Which would set the rest of us at the table off into paroxisms of laughing... remembering some of the more heated games of recent memory between those same people.

We did our best, but really, we're family and we enjoy poking fun at each other. My brother introduced us to his pregnant wife that night (no I had never met her before, and no we weren't invited to the wedding... things were a bit strained at first). And then convinced her that she needed to join in the game. Since the girl comes from a family of six, where she was the only girl, we figured she could handle us. At one point, she looked at the other five of us at the table and asked, "Are you sure you aren't siblings?" Considering that she was married to one of my siblings and one of my other siblings was at the table with her husband we were a bit confused. "Who?" And she pointed between me and my cousins. We had to laugh... "Well, we might as well be. We were raised more as siblings than as cousins." And that explains it all. We were raised more as siblings, we were there for every major event, we were there every month for the family get together, we were there for weddings, birthdays and baptisms... and even though there are times when I want to bang my head against the wall... I wouldn't trade that for anything in the whole entire world.

Now you're wondering what in the world this has to do with writing... nothing... and everything. My family is the reason I believe in Happy-Ever-After. I saw on a daily basis parents and aunts and uncles who shared their love with the rest of us. I watched my mother and father kiss in public and hold hands and have seen the same from my aunts and uncles. It taught me the kind of love I deserved, and I refused to settle for less. My family is the reason I can look at my cousin who has yet to find a man willing to take on a single mother with some issues and think, "Someday, I'll write her story." Because I love her, and want her happy, I will be there when she does find her One and I will share in her joy.

When a character pops into my head, I can honestly say that they have quite a bit of my family in them... whether it's a stubborn determination to refuse to settle... or a spunky heroine who feels no shame in the shape of her body because she had a family of big beautiful, women with curves. Our life experiences mold our writing. They speak to us, and through us, and go out into the world as an example of who you are and what you believe. I hope that I can make a reader laugh the way my family makes me laugh... I hope that I can put forth that emotion that I learned at the feet of the women in my family who never gave up and never took no for an answer, and in the process they raised some pretty spectacular friends that I am lucky enough to call family. That's the feeling I want to put in my stories. I'm sure you'll let me know if I fail at that, lol. :-D

Anyway, everyone have a beautiful Tuesday. I'll be hiking Valley of Fire with my family and storing away more memories to bring out and look over again... but not until it quiets down a bit around here. LOL

Not Here... and Announcement!

Okay, I wasn't here today. I spent most of the day at the hospital keeping my mom company while my dad was in surgery. So, I'm a bit exhausted and forgot today was my usual day to blog. So you get a late post. Dad's fine, he had hip surgery, but he's cranky... he's not the best of patients and my mom worries while he's in the OR. Might be because she's a nurse and knows all that could go wrong. So, since the hubby was off work today, I hung out with my mom at the hospital most of the day. Now, I'm off to hide in my room so I can hopefully... finally... finish revisions to resubmit my cowboy story to TWRP.

Speaking of cowboy stories (ya like how I segued there?): Our good friend Sandy Sullivan had a release last week! Way to go Sandy! (Yup, give me a holler and I'll announce yours too... lol) Her book Cowboy Love came out on Thursday the 10th of September, and is available from Siren Publishing. It looks purty good too!

Cowboy Love by Sandy Sullivan

Amy Russell has sworn off men until she runs into Tanner Lewis. His muscular chest, soft brown eyes and drop dead gorgeous, sexy dimpled smile has her rethinking her decision. Can she learn to trust again, especially a cowboy, after her ex broke her heart? Will she let Tanner penetrate the shell around her heart?

Tanner's been burned. Yeah, he was in love once, until he caught his fiancé in bed with his best friend. Now all he wants is to get his singing career on the right path. Just when he thinks things are going perfectly, he runs smack into Amy Russell, horse tamer extraordinaire and registered nurse. As he watches her take a difficult horse and turn it into a docile pussycat with nothing more than soft words and a kind touch, he's fascinated, but Amy doesn't want a relationship. Can he convince her there's nothing better than a cowboy's love?

Too Busy? Who Me? NEVER!

The Summer is officially over for my kids. School started yesterday and life seems to have suddenly settled down. YAY! What does this mean? Oh, come on... you know what it means... I get a couple hours of complete and utter silence each day. Okay, not complete silence, I do still have a dog and a toddler.

What am I doing with this time? I'm glad you asked. *snicker* I am getting my "life" organized again. It's so hard with all four kids running around the house (cuz, really it's so hot here that they don't get to run outside very much during the summer) and lots of, "I'm bored"s to keep me on the edge of my seat it was rather hard to get things done that I wanted/needed to get done. Again, you wonder... what things?

For some darned reason I decided that I didn't have enough to do and started a small jewelry business. Yeah, I know, I never said I was entirely sane. So, we (meaning my husband, sister and I) have been amassing supplies and trying to figure out logos and names and blah blah blah. It's actually been fun...

But what else am I doing? Oh, when the house is silent when the baby is napping and the boys are at school I sit with my laptop on my lap and run through edits. Yup, I am finally able to focus on my currents WIPs! Woo hoo! I did the minor edits that needed doing on my Cowboy story. You know the one that I submitted and was told that it was good, but if I could fix it up they'd take another look at it. I've been working my way through the story and it's been rather interesting. Why?

Well, I can definitely make the changes they suggest, but then I feel that the story will be... half-done. It won't flow as well if I don't add even more to it. I can really get into where it should go and what should be added, but now I'm wondering if I'll add too much. If I'll make it just too complicated.

I met up with a girlfriend the other night for a much needed, No-Kids-No-Men-(Except the Waiter)-Dinner-With-A-Friend where we spent hours (and I do mean hours) talking about books and storylines, our love lives or lack of one in her case, how adorable our waiter was and everything else we could possibly think of. She is an avid reader who's never really wanted to write, but who enjoys immensely the way an author's brain works and loves to add her ideas and thoughts about a story. She's an invaluable person to have on your side, whether as a friend or as a sounding board. Talking with her, my muse was going nuts and she had some awesome ideas on how to make my story work without making it the perfect sleep-aid. There were also a few times where I just didn't think her idea would work, at least not with that story (and we talked about three of them).

So, what did I learn? So far, I've learned that not everyone's ideas will work with where I want the story to go. I've learned that I wish my writing came out perfect the first time (yeah, yeah, I know, don't we all?). And I've learned that sometimes just talking with a friend about your book and everything plus the kitchen sink can set the muse free to figure stuff out and make your work so much better. Did any of this make sense to y'all? Am I just making sense to myself? I guess if that's the case it's alright... since I'm the one who has to live with myself. LOL I hope everyone is having a wonderful week and that you find what you need to make your life just a little bit better. :-D

Not Much Here

It's been a rather hectic month. We've had two family emergencies in our family that resulted in frantic packing and rushing out of town. The end results were a brother-in-law who had a rather painful wakeup call in the form of a Massive MI, and the loss of a beloved Grandmother. As you can imagine, it's all been bittersweet. We're still dealing with grief, and my boys have their first taste of losing someone that they will dearly miss.

I do apologize to everyone if I seem a bit frazzled lately, but that is entirely because I am a bit frazzled lately. So, I'm at a little bit of a loss for what to talk about today. I can't even remember what week it is and if I have anything going on writing wise, other than the fact that I've been working steadily on revisions for my Cowboy submission. I really want to get it polished and published. Once I get my newest revisions done I'll hand it off again to my CPs and see what they say.

Hmmm... I think that's all for now. Sorry, y'all, hopefully I'll have more to talk about next time.

How... Embarassing...

Hee hee.. okay, I'm one of those people who doesn't really embarass easily. If anything, I can usually find humor in just about any situation. Maybe it has something to do with the completely insane family I came from. I think that my brain takes some things and just runs with them. Might be my writer's imagination.. might just be that I have a dirty mind that lives in the gutter most of the time.

Well, today I want to share something that happened to my husband and made me laugh until I cried and my stomach hurt. I guess technically it happened to both of us, but I don't really see it coming back to bite ME in the ass. *snicker*

Some of y'all know that my hubby has a very twisted sense of humor. In fact, my family has accused ME of corrupting HIM, when truthfully it was the other way around. They just never believe me... he looks like a freaking choir boy.

Well, the other day, my hubby was making a few phone calls. He was sitting at the computer and I heard him dial a number and then my cell phone went off... with HIS ring tone that is specific to his numbers. I turned in my chair and asked, "Why are you calling my cell phone from the house phone? I know where it is, it's in my purse."

He looked at me, very confused, "It's not me!" Now, color me confused, as he is the ONLY one that ring tone comes up for, granted it's three different numbers, but they're all his. I could see the light dawn on him as he reached into his pocket and found his cell phone... which had dialed mine. Yep, that's right, he'd bumped it with some part of his body and dialed my number.

"Wow!" He was laughing as he disconnected the call from his cell phone. "It's pretty bad when my penis dials your cell phone just to get closer to your mouth." I'm NOT kidding. I rolled my eyes and went to turn away, which was when I noticed he had a phone in each hand.

"Um, babe, did you dial that last number before your cell called mine?"

"Shit." Then he proceeded to ask for who he had originally called for. Did I mention that my husband is a Scout master and was calling one of his Scouts' homes to talk with him? No? Yeah, you can imagine the look of horror on my husband's face as he realized he was speaking to his Scout's much younger sister.

Is it bad of me that I laughed? I don't just mean a little chuckle... I mean it was a good thing I was already sitting down or I would have been rolling on the floor. I kept quiet until he hung up the phone...but once he hit the "OFF" button I laughed until it hurt. Then I calmed down, took one look at my hubby's face.. and laughed some more.

"Shit, I hope that doesn't come back to bite me in the ass." Yeah, me too.

So, how do you take embarassment? Do you laugh it off and move on? Do you wonder over and over what you could have said/done differently? Do you use it for fodder for your muse? I'd really like to know if I'm the only one who just doesn't take these things too seriously. Well, I hope you got a laugh, and that you realize that even when you inadvertantly proposition someone's sister that life goes on and most people have a sense of humor about these things. I still have no idea if his sister heard the whole conversation... but no one has shown up on our doorstep to arrest my hubby either. I'll take what I can get. :-D.

Creativity out the Wazoo

I had an insanely busy day yesterday, and you can read all about it at my MySpace blog if you'd like. It's long and I didn't want to take up so much space here. That's more my personal blog where I talk about... stuff.... that's not always associated with writing.

Today, I wanted to ask you other authors out there how you do it? How do you deal with your creativity if it's coming out the wazoo? I know that I have an excess of creative energy that doesn't feel book like. Does that make sense? I love writing, but sometimes I need to put my creativity toward other things. I play around with altering photos so I can use them as MySpace comments or to be part of a digital scrapbook. I make cards because I love the fact I can make a better card than the ones sold in the stores and because I made it, the person receiving it loves it even more. I used to do scrapbooks, but I don't have the time right now. I need something that I can focus on and get done in about an hour or less. Lately I have been making book thongs. Thanks to my sweetie author friend, KyAnn Waters, I won one from her some time ago and I have been making them myself. It's kind of addictive the whole bead collecting and threading and it's just a lot of fun. I might even start using them as part of contests and promotions for The Menagerie authors and stuff. But those things still aren't enough. I still feel like I want to do other creative stuff away from my writing.

My hubby says it's because I have an addictive personality... and? He wants the sex addiction to kick in. I said, "Honey... I write erotic romance, you help with the research... you want me to be even more addicted than I already am?" Guess so.

So, does anyone else have this problem of an overabundance of creativity, or: Creativity Out the Wazoo? What sorts of crafts/creative things do you do? Can I learn it? LOL

Random Acts...

She walked slowly between the cars holding up her cardboard sign, "Homeless. Struggling to get by. Need help." She looked ashamed, wouldn't meet anyone's gaze as she wandered down the aisle made by the idling cars at the stoplight. This isn't going to be a happy bouncy post. It's one that is hitting very close to home right now.

You know as "humans" we tend to avoid their gaze, think, "Oh, they should just go to the shelter and get out of my line of sight." Because, that's what it is, no one wants to look because then they might be reminded... "That could be me."

As she walked past our van window, desperately trying to avoid eye contact with us, my husband made the comment. "God, babe, she's younger than you!" I know. And the light changed and we drove on toward home. We had four tired kids in the car and hubs had to work early in the morning. But, my stomach roiled and clenched all the way.

We got halfway home from where we had seen this young woman when my hubby turned to me and said, "Are you alright?" At first I thought he was referring to the dry raspy cough I'd been fighting all weekend.

"I just don't feel well." But I knew he didn't believe me.

"You're thinking about her." And I was. Something about her just called me back to her. The further we got from her, the more nausea I felt.

"We have to go back and see what we can do for her." It didn't matter to me, I had to find out what happened, if she needed help, if there was anything I could do. She was so young! If it hadn't been for the love and support of my family I could have been in the same position... except with a baby. My hubby, knowing about my past, and knowing the kind of person I am flipped a u-turn immediately and we went back.

She was still at the intersection, and seemed a bit leary coming over to where we were parked to talk to us. Can't say as I blame her, she had no idea who we were. But I had a strong urging that we NEEDED to do something. Talking with her we found out that she was staying in an alley behind an ice cream parlor and the two other homeless people who lived there as well did their best to take care of her, but she was still alone.

We took her to the Neighborhood WalMart across the street from where she was panhandling. I went in with her and wanted to cry when she only asked for a couple Cup A Soups and a bottle of water. I convinced her that she could get more than that so I loaded a box of 12 Cup A Soups (she said it was easier, as the ice cream parlor let her use their microwave), then a pack of water and some lemonade. I knew it still wouldn't be enough, but I didn't want to harm her pride. I convinced her that she could get granola bars and cereal bars as well. When I told her to toss a hairbrush in she asked if she could get some deodorant and some face wash cloths. I wasn't worried about the money, our kids can go without McDonald's and such for a couple of weeks, but it was worth it.

She talked with me while we were in the store and I learned her story was so sad, and yet how many people have family that won't help in these kinds of circumstances saying they're teaching you a lesson in survival. Makes no bloody sense to me.

Anyway, I took some cash out of our account along with the groceries and transferred her groceries to her "spot". We stood outside the van asking her if she was okay, if there was anything else we could do. She told us that she'd been burned before and if we were serious about being in her life and helping, then she would take our phone numbers and call us once she could.

The hardest part about it is that she wants to find a job, but she has no address for reference, no phone number to reach her, and her appearance isn't the best due to living on the streets for so long. It's a lose-lose situation.

As we dropped her off, she told us, "You know, I was despairing tonight. No one was stopping no one was looking at me and I thought: I need a miracle, or else I don't know when I'll get to eat again!

I don't know that we were her miracle or if we were just following the promptings of that still small voice. Either way, she is still on my mind tonight and I hope she calls. While we didnt feel great leaving her in her circumstance, there wasn't much choice. But I hope that our Random Act of Kindness can get her through the next few days at least, maybe longer considering we gave her some cash as well.

Please, don't call me sappy for hoping she can get her life together. Don't tell me she'll just using it to get alcohol or drugs. I trust my instincts and I am in no danger from her and she is rather adament about drug an alcohol use.

Do you think we should keep our eyes out for Random Acts we can do? I'm a pretty strong believer in that. Just thought I would share with y'all since it's been weighing heavily on me today. Ahem...that's wha I wanted to talk about.

Why Am I Embarassed?

"OH, guess what she does NOW... she writes Erotic Romance!" Yup, my cousin let the cat out of the bag with that drunken pronouncement.

Recently, while out on the town with my cousin and some college friends visiting Vegas I was faced with this dilemma: Do I own up to what I do when it might change the way someone looks at me? Can I live with myself if I lie about it, because I love what I write?

"No, way!" One of the guys with us was boggle-eyed and obviously not a believer. "YOU? The girl who doesn't drink alcohol? Who only drinks soda all night long? No WAY!" Then he tilted his head, "Nevermind, I can totally see it." I guess he was remembering the fact that I don't need alcohol to dance on the bar/tabletop with the other goyles... or maybe he was remembering thirty minutes before when I switched out my super-heavy sweater for my cousin's much lighter one all while sitting at our table in the club (in my defense it was sweltering and she wasn't using hers... and no skin showed.. okay my arm and shoulder did). Nevertheless he demanded proof of my "OTHER" job.

Unfortunately... or fortunately depending on your outlook... my cousin pulled out her iPhone and punched in the Long And Short website where my three short stories currently reside. If it was possible (and believe me it was) his eyes bugged out even more, "I'll have to read this later... when you're not around. HERE, program it into MY iPhone!"

Now, while I DID program it for him, I didn't call him later to ask if he had indeed read them after I was no longer around. A very large part of me was glad he showed an interest (along with all the other people in our group)... but I wasn't all that surprised. He is after all a guy and if it has sex in it they're all for it. The other part of me was a bit embarassed though, and that made me a bit angry. WHY was I embarassed about something I love doing, I enjoy reading, and that has quite a large number of fans?

Honestly? Because, I didn't really want to change that Status Quo we had come to rely on. I didn't want to have to explain why I chose this genre... or if I'd actually done the things I write about. Because, while I adore them... there are just some things that they don't need to know about me. If my hubby had been with us I know that he would have smiled and said he loved the research aspect of it (like someone else has said HER hubby likes to say... ahem... Nina), but looking my friends in the face I smiled and changed the subject. Don't worry, they brought it back up again later, and I had made my peace with them knowing, so it was all good.

But the question still remains... WHY am I embarassed when the subject comes up (except with certain members of my family, my cousin to name one)? Am I the only one who struggles with telling someone I've known "before" the writing? Believe me, it's not something I'm going to be telling my Mother-In-Law that I do, and other more judgemental members of my family don't need to know either as they already make some family gatherings... interesting, but I LOVE what I do and I'm not ashamed, but I am embarassed to explain. So... anyone else have these issues? I'm just wondering.

Where Does The Time Go?

Okay, I know... BAD Kealie :::slapping hand::: I forgot the hottie on Saturday. My only explanation is that we had a huge emtional upset in our family and as the oldest it was kind of on me to sort of figure out how to deal with it. That's done, and I'm back and life goes on. But, where does the time go?

I am especially thinking on this today as I look through some discs. About two years ago our desktop PC crashed and we lost TONS of information, photos and videos of our kids. I lost research I had done on Ireland and the Gaelic language (LOTS OF RESEARCH!) and was devastated. At the time, we had (and still have) a friend who fixes computers in his "spare" time, and he's pretty good. He took the harddrive and later told us that there was no saving it. So we bought a new computer (and my laptop) and moved on.

Yesterday, he gave my husband THREE discs of information he'd managed to salvage off of our harddrive. He said that he knew how upset I was at losing all that information and had been working in his spare time going through each part of the drive that he could. The result was three discs of info. I didn't want to get my hopes up and didn't know what to expect but last night I popped in the first disc and am STILL going through all that he managed to pull. I still have two more discs to look through.

There is video of my third son's birth and his first Christmas. There is video of my husband's Grandparents with the boys (and while they are still alive and in their 90s, some of these videos were precious and thought to be lost forever), and some of the breakthroughs we had with our oldest child and his disorder are on here as well. I'm so excited and was so happy that I sat down last night and just cried!

But, as I sit here and look through these videos I wonder... where did the time go? There are pictures of my oldest when he was a "little boy". I know, he's only 9 now, but he seems so big and so grown up and these pictures and videos are of him as the oldest of my babies. Pictures of my second child with his curly blond hair before he got old enough to realize that if he had me keep it short it didn't get so curly (dangit). There are pictures and video of my third baby as a baby before he could talk back and charm the heck out of anyone with just a smile and a flash of those dimples. I got my babies back!

There are reams of research that I vaguely remembered and wondered if I made up but couldn't find and now I see that I didn't make it up. There are scenes and thoughts on characters that I had constantly running through my head and once I finally wrote them down they disappeared from my memory and I see them here again. It's like running into an old friend you weren't sure you'd ever seen again and the joy you find at getting to know them again. I'm so excited and grateful for all of it!

So, I ask you: Do you ever stop and wonder where the time went? Do you ever stop and just revel in the fact that your kids are growing and if we blink we'll miss it? Do you ever find something that you've written (for those of you who are authors) after thinking it's gone and find an old friend in the process?

Life... It Really Is Worth It!

Hey, everyone... or no one as the case may be. I hope all of y'all haven't disappeared due to my lack of keeping up our blog. It's been rather interesting to watch everything go a bit insane around me. Between trips out of town, a cold that we have all been so gracious to share amongst my family (twice), a bout of pink-eye (but only one child YAY!), a dog who may be going a bit neurotic and doctors' appointments for myself it's been fun to count my blessings.... BUT, I can count my blessings! Here we go, count with me!

1) The cold is really just a cold. Sniffles, coughing and sneezing... but no flu, nothing really bad and not even any really sleepless nights have been had. If anything, it's funny to hear how we all sound right now. My 6 year old doesn't think it's so funny that mommy laughs when he says, "Cad I hab a gyath of waddur?" and was quick to point out that for several days I sounded like a dolphin! Laughter is the best medicine.

2) The trips out of town were for holidays, and to see the hubby's family. It was great fun to see the cousins playing together and to make a craft with one of my nieces and encourage the love of music in my gorgeous teenaged niece; we exchanged music and talked about music since we both got iPods for Christmas this year... and she's such a girly-girl and I don't get to do that very much!

3) The pink-eye was mild, only the one child got it and it cleared up in two days. YAY!

4) My fur-baby Harley doesn't have any serious health issues... other than deciding suddenly that he no longer wants to be an indoor dog when he's always been an indoor dog. A German Shepherd mix he's a BIG indoor dog, but he's my baby! Honestly, as chaotic as it's been lately... the only peace the poor baby gets is when he goes outside and flirts with the little Yorkie next door. Considering she only comes up to his shin... it wouldn't work out, but he can hope!

5) While the doctors can't say what exactly is going on after TONS of tests, they CAN tell me that structurally my heart is fine, arteries and such aren't clogged and I don't need any sort of heart surgery. WHEW! That is a load off, now we do more tests to see if ew CAN figure out what's going on.

6) I love my family, and they love me and I refuse to leave them anytime soon!

7) My dance classes started back up this last week, and while I had to say good bye to quite a few of my students in December when I quit working for one of the Centers I worked at, I still have fun with the students I do have. They can make me smile on a day when I wasn't sure I'd smile at all. I can walk into a class in a horrid mood and those sweet little faces with their excitement at dancing and learning will have me leaving with a smile on MY face and a lighter step.

8) With all this chaos, I am finally getting organized! How flipping perverse is that? We pulled everything out of the boys' rooms and got rid of a BUNCH of stuff. For every toy they keep they have to donate one, and not only do we reduce the stuff they have, but they learn a valuable lesson: There are children out there who don't have it as good as they do. They're still spoiled... but we're hoping they learn values that I find so lacking in our world today.

9) I have some of the most wonderful friends in the world. Both online and in the "real" world. Some of them might as well be siblings, we've grown so close. They forgive me my faults, I only hope that I can repay them in the same love and friendship that they have given me.

10) Another year has gone by and we have our home in a time when so many homes are in foreclosure. We have food in our stomachs and my children have NEVER had to go hungry. My husband won't be losing his job as so many others have, including family members and friends. Life is good... and it's worth it to count the blessings.

I have more, but I figure this was enough. It always lifts my spirits to remember what is GOOD in my life, even if all is not well. How about your blessings? They're there, I promise!

Lifus Interruptus

*sigh* I suck... I'm sorry everyone! I forgot completely about Saturday Hottie. Actually, I started one and was so tired I told myself I'd finish it Saturday morning... instead life interrupted and I never made it back onto the computer Saturday. I have been making files and getting them organized to have posts ready to go ahead of time, but it hasn't come to complete fruition yet. Hopefully, soon I'll be able to have stuff all organized.

So, aside from a nagging case of Lifus Interruptus, things have been pretty fun in our house. I love Christmas, and with four children I am constantly given an opportunity to see the world in a whole new way.

We had a fun activity that we participated in this weekend: Breakfast With Santa! Technically, we didn't get to eat directly with Santa, but we had a nice breakfast as a family and then got to visit with Santa (there were a lot of kids, I think Santa would have been trampled if he hadn't sat on his... throne and had some order to the whole thing). My kids loved it... except the baby. His reaction was the most dramatic we've ever had to date. At first he was fine with this person taking him and holding him (he's a pretty easygoing kid), but once he did a double-take and saw it was some strange man with lots of white hair on his face... he got a bit frantic and started to scream and squirm to get away. The entire time I was trying to take the pictures with my hubby insisting quite loudly that I hurry cuz the baby was freaking out... and my camera wouldn't take the picture. Poor Santa valiantly tried to keep the baby from nose-diving off his lap until I could get the picture. He succeeded, but not a moment too soon by the way, my camera worked and my hubby snatched the baby from Santa who looked a little strained.

Needless to say, it was interesting and fun. It wasn't until we got home and loaded the picture that I realized that I had actually captured the baby's double-take at Santa. The look on his face is priceless!

Well, here's to holiday memories no matter what your traditions, and I hope Lifus Interruptus doesn't take permanent hold on my life, lol.

Thanks... for .... everything

I have been very sick the past couple of days... when it rains it pours. Mysti and Jenny get a bit antsy when they can't reach me, but that's what is going on. I feel rather like when it rains it pours. This month has been overwhelming: Marital issues...I get sick... hubby gets hurt, BADLY, and we are dealing with recuperation...I get really sick again... and nothing is really moving through my brain at a very easy pace.

I did get a short finished and subbed to WC and they posted it to their site this last week... sorry I didn't give y'all more notice, but it's been rather... rough lately to do anything beyond the basics in getting through each day.

A friend of mine pointed out, since he is quite a bit like me in this regard, that my writing is what sustains me, what gets me through when I'm not sure I want to push through. When it feels like it would just be easier to give up. AJ reminded me that this is who we are. We are writers and we take in everything... good or bad... and we save it. Then when it doesn't hurt so much, when we can pull it out and look at it without wanting to scream, then we use it. We go back to it and lose ourselves in these worlds we create. I may not have really been accessing my laptop, but I have notebooks throughout the house with my favorite sharpie pens attatched to them so that I can write some stream of consciousness and maybe work past some issues.

So, right now, I feel disconnected, discombobulated all sorts of 'dis' feelings, but I'm still writing. I'm still working through my feelings of anger, frustration, loss of trust, and just plain being sick / a nursemaid / then sick again... so hang in there with me. Hopefully, I'll come out the other end of this sooner rather than later and amazing stories will be able to be told. Maybe I'll be able to use some of it for my NaNoWriMo challenge coming up next month. As another dear friend keeps reminding me... "Writers write. Period." Trying to keep that one going.

Thanks for being there, those of you who have held my hand, cried with me and threatened bodily harm to the person or persons who ruined some of my trust. Y'all keep me going when I just want to lie down and give up for awhile. Now that I've made myself cry it's time to totter off to bed and try to avoid puking again (yes, yes, TMI, deal with it). Your support means a great deal... so thanks.